“That day, I learned that I could be a giver simply by bringing a smile to another person.”
Maya, 16
The last autobiography Angelou wrote and published when she was eighty-five, Mom & Me & Mom is a tribute to Angelou’s mother. In this book, Angelou allows Vivian Baxter to be wholly herself: her mistakes, her triumphs, her love, her anger, all of her. It is generously written and an interesting uncovering of Angelou’s unusual relationship with her mother. Through accepting her mother, Angelou accepts herself without blame or bitterness. It is a book of gratitude.
Without knowing when Angelou wrote this book, I felt that her voice differed from her other works. Angelou’s writing in her later life is minimalist and unique. I felt deep forgiveness and healing in her words; forgiveness and healing that perhaps took a lifetime of practice. Angelou writes her mother into words from memories, understanding, and love.
It’s fascinating to read about Angelou’s perspective of her own life from her elderly perspective. As she reaches the end of her life, she looks back, witnesses her memories and the people she loves with an abundance of gratitude. She doesn’t judge harshly a mother who left her two children, she doesn’t hide with embarrassment an abusive relationship or blames herself or others for why it happened, and she admires the moments when she is strong enough to leave, brave enough to speak, loving enough to long for her child, and tender enough to forgive.
Mom & Me & Mom is a beautiful guide for how to grow old.